The Last Time...

No one knows when the last time will be when you will see a loved one, hug a loved one, kiss a loved one, touch a loved one, exchange meaningful words with a loved one. By 'loved one' I mean everyone who you share a piece of your heart with in your life, no matter how big or small.

I remember the last time I hugged my godbrother Raymond. Every single time I saw him, without fail he would greet me with a hug bigger than himself and a kiss on the cheek. He would do the same every time one of us had to leave too. He was a baby brother to me, being 7.5 years my junior.

I remember our last encounter. He almost left without his usual hug and kiss and I thought that was very odd, so I had to ask him "Where is my hug and kiss goodbye?". And then he came over sheepishly and we hugged and he gave me a kiss. That was the last time.

The next time I saw him, he had slipped into a coma. It was just two months before his twelfth birthday. While he was still conscious he had asked for me, but for reasons I cannot remember, I was not able to reach him in time.

Time seemed to drag on forever at the hospital, and I cannot even remember how many days I was there. Maybe it was two days, maybe it was a week? His passing on April 21st 1998 was a very sad day. It's everyone's worst nightmare to lose someone they love so much. It's like having a piece of your heart ripped away, and there is a gaping hole, and no words can describe the deep pain...

But love permeates even death. My thoughts on life and death will be for another time in another blog when I feel like it :-) Love is eternal, is infinite. I too echo the words as sung by Darren Hayes..."I believe in love surviving death into eternity."

In Raymond's passing, there awakened something grand and great within me. Sometimes you do need something to happen to you to make you realise that you have been living your life with your eyes closed. In his passing, my spirituality awakened, and from that perspective life has been a truly amazing experience ever since that time...